Can’t Get Past a First Date? Here’s What You’re Doing Wrong

I’m not going to lie – my confidence is shattered when I go out on a first date and then she starts to ignore me. I know this is a sign she didn’t like me. I start questioning what’s wrong with me. Then I usually come to the realization that I screwed things up. I’m always honest with myself because that’s the only way I can improve. It’s usually not personal when a woman isn’t into you. You probably made some mistakes on a date that led her to determine you’re not a suitable mate. I’ll bet the mistake(s) you made were one of these…

Go out on a first date

Go out on a first date

You weren’t confident enough

Ask any woman what she looks for in a man. The top answer will be confidence. For single mothers, this is even more accurate. A confident man is assertive and knows how to take control of a household. Take control of the date and don’t be afraid to go in for a kiss when she’s giving you indications she likes you. Step up and be a man or she’ll lose interest in you. Confidence is sexy. If you don’t have it, you better learn how to get it.

Women looks for in a man

Women looks for in a man

You rambled on and on about nothing, or even worse – yourself

Women want to get to know the guy they’re on a date with. But they don’t need your entire life story. That won’t give her much time to talk about herself, which is something women LOVE to do. Let her do most of the talking, but stay in control of the conversation. If she wants to know something about you, she’ll ask you. Make sure you’re always paying attention to everything she says so you can respond with a comment related to what she said.

You didn’t charm her

Were you able to make her laugh? And I’m not talking about a courtesy laugh women give so they don’t hurt your feelings. I’m talking about a genuine laugh and smile when you talk. Laughter is very important on a first date. If you can make her laugh, she’ll want to see you again. Funny guys are not boring to be around. With that said, don’t be TOO funny. Everything you say should not be a sarcastic remark. You’re not trying out for Last Comic Standing on a date. There’s more to charming a woman than making her laugh. Talking about anything she finds interesting is also good. You must smile and look her in the eyes throughout the night. A nice smile and good eye contact will get you far with a woman.

You dressed like a bum

A suit and a tie are unnecessary on a first date unless you’re taking her out to some 5-star restaurant. But that doesn’t mean you should show up with a pair of Jorts, a ball cap, Metallica T-shirt on. How you present yourself will determine her first impressions of you. Wear a nice, clean pair of jeans. Go spend a few extra bucks and shop at a store that sells more stylish jeans than a typical department store. The shirt should be button-down and should match well with the jeans. Don’t underestimate the importance of wearing nice shoes. She will notice. A crummy pair of shoes can offset the otherwise nice outfit you’re wearing.

You present yourself will determine her first impressions of you

You present yourself will determine her first impressions of you

The First Date: 5 Never-Lie Signs She’s Into You

I usually give dating advice for single parents specifically. But since the signs of attraction are not exclusive to only certain groups of people, I’m going to show you 5 obvious signs any woman is into a guy. They are usually easy to pick-up on. If you catch her doing at least a few of these signs on a first date or following the date, she more than enjoys your company.

Find single parents dating here!

Find single parents dating here!

Her Eyes Get Big When You Talk

She doesn’t just like what she hears. She also likes what she sees. This is something women do subconsciously when they like a man. They’re like a kid in a candy store and you’re a giant, tasty sucker. And, no, I don’t mean that in a perverted way so get your mind out of the gutter!

She moves towards you

Humans naturally gravitate towards something they’re comfortable with. As the night goes on, watch how she begins to position herself. Is she moving closer to you throughout the night? She may not even realize she’s doing it. But if she does, that’s a strong indication she’s comfortable with her company.

She touches your wrist

This is another subconscious signal women make to indicate attraction. Putting her hands on your wrist while talking means she’s either very flirtatious or she likes you. You’ll know if it’s just her flirtatious nature or she likes you if she continues to do it throughout the night. Even a woman that’s flirtatious with everyone will quit flirting with a guy she’s not into after a while.

She makes solid eye contact with you

Outgoing, confident women always look a man they are attracted to directly in the eyes when they talk, and when he talks. They won’t look away or down when either of you are talking unless they’re not attracted. Shy girls are more difficult to read. They may not look you in the eyes, so look for blushing. A shy girl will blush a lot around a guy she likes, but may be afraid to look him directly in the eyes. She may smile, make momentary eye contact, and then turn her head away. That’s a pretty dang good sign she’s digging you.

Shy girls

Shy girls

When you text her, she responds promptly

A bad sign after a first date with a woman you met online is if she begins ignoring you. She probably isn’t interested. Some women never respond promptly to text messages and calls. If the length of time takes longer for her to respond after meeting than it did before, she’s not interested. On the contrary, if she begins responding quicker to your texts, she definitely enjoyed herself on the date, so make sure you ask her for a second one soon.

First date with a woman you met online

First date with a woman you met online

I Signed Up a Month Ago and Haven’t Met Any Men

Ah, yes, the ‘ol “I can’t meet any guys online, is there something wrong with me?” question. Usually, the only thing wrong with the woman is a lack of understanding what attracts men online. Sure, a cute photo will get you in the door, but it won’t get you as far as you might think. Single parents need more than eye candy. Well, the mature ones do. You have to give men the impression you’ve got it going on “upstairs” or looks will barely matter. So what exactly are you doing wrong? Probably making one (or more) of the following mistakes…

You seem whiny, needy, desperate, jealous, negative, or way too emotional in your profile

What guy would want to date a headcase? If you have some emotional issues – seek counseling. And don’t mention them in your profile. The content tone of an online dating profile should be positive and a bit humorous. Negative people aren’t fun to be around. Does your profile reflect that of a negative person? If so, that’s likely why men aren’t contacting you.

You can meet any guys online

You can meet any guys online

Your response messages lack substance and/or are lame

When you receive an email or Instant Message from a guy, do you typically respond with “LOL” or 2-word messages that lack substance? This gives him the impression you’re not that into him. The guy shouldn’t be the only one working to keep the conversation flowing. Show some initiative and take control of the conversation – without interrupting him. If the chatter is running dry, bust out a funny line. Even better idea – ask him a question about his interests, education, job, etc.

Women that aren’t interested in a guy usually don’t ask him many questions. They’ll either ignore, say “LOL” to everything, or give a cheesy response that’s only purpose is to not appear rude by ignoring. Men know this. Even the most clueless guy can pick-up on these signs. So if you really do like him, you better show that to him during conversations.

Your profile pictures aren’t attractive

Looks do matter to men. Even to the 30-something single parents that are beyond their Frat Boy days. If you’re not presentable, men won’t be contacting you online. You can control how attractive you look in a profile picture. Smile pretty, get your hair done nice, and dress in a style that matches your personality. To attract a completely superficial guy, you need good genes. But who cares about these guys anyway? Even if you were blessed with amazing genes, don’t waste your time with men that only care about looks. Go after men that value personality most, and looks second.

You look attractive in a profile picture

You look attractive in a profile picture

5 Signs She Might Be the Perfect Woman

I could talk all day about the types of women a single Dad should avoid. But for this article, I’m going to keep things positive and talk about the women you should go after. Each single Mom that has her act together will display these 5 attractive characteristics…

Worries about her kids

A good parent constantly worries about their kids when they aren’t with them. It’s a good sign if you’re out on a date and she mentions that she needs to check-in with the babysitter to see how things are going. Even though you’re on a date, a caring mother is still equally concerned about what her kids are doing. Why should this matter to you? Because she will likely give the same kind of caring attention to your kids someday.

A good parent constantly worries about their kids

A good parent constantly worries about their kids

Will ditch you for an emergency without flinching

There’s nothing worse than a date that ends unexpectedly. That is, of course, unless she ditches you to attend to her sick child. Some parents will call the father to take the child to the hospital so they don’t flake out on the new guy. I have mad respect for any woman that puts her kids above anything. Her leaving a date for her child should not bother you.

No apparent baggage

Having kids doesn’t mean she has baggage. You can easily tell how much baggage she has from your first conversation. Does she constantly complain about her crazy ex? If so, you’re in for quite the headache. If she hardly even mentions the ex, this is an encouraging sign.

Her kids aren’t the only part of her life

I’m very much against dating a woman that doesn’t have much going for her other than her kids. She’ll be likely to get attached to you too quickly and will become controlling. Single Mom’s love their kids, but they need more than that to be completely happy. When there is nothing else in their life (i.e. good job, close friends), they become emotionally attached right away to the first thing that comes along.

Single Mom’s love their kids

Single Mom’s love their kids

She’s been out with other men

I like a woman that’s been around – but not in the bedroom. It shows me she’s not desperate enough to settle for the first guy she meets. Women that are patient usually have high self-esteem. Ask her how many guys she’s met recently online. If it’s more than 1 or 2, that could be a good sign…unless she scared the other men away!

Guys can met recently online

Guys can met recently online

Specific Examples of Why You Should Never Lie on Your Online Dating Profile

You can be anyone you want to be online. You might actually be some sissy-boy offline, but the baddest dude around online. This can be a fun game…until you actually start meeting women. Then the gig is up. She’ll figure out you were lying sooner rather than later. And once you’re caught lying to a woman, your relationship with her is over. A few of my friends ended up getting caught in a lie. Because of their carelessness, I’m going to share with you each of their stories, and I hope they read them in shame…

“I’m (not really) 6’1”

Lying about height almost seems like the cool thing to do. My buddy is 5’10, in shoes. Barely. On his profile, he claimed to be 6’1. It’s easy to hide your actual height in a photo. He set-up a date with a woman he thought seemed interesting. He showed up for the date, she took one look at him and said, “you’re a liar, goodbye”, and walked away. Ouch!

As it turns out, she’s attracted to tall guys and men that are honest. My friend’s not generally a dishonest guy, but he certainly was in this case. How he thought she wouldn’t notice the height disparity from what his profile claimed is beyond me. I think he’s learned his lesson.

Women’s attracted to tall guys

Women’s attracted to tall guys

I’m looking for a relationship, not sex (but I’d prefer sex)”

Another friend of mine tried to sign-up for a single parent dating site appearing to be a hopeless romantic. Someone gave him the idea that single Mother’s are easy. He sure didn’t learn that nonsense from me. His whole schtick was to sign-up, act like a sweet and caring person, and then sleep with them on a first date. He actually succeeded at doing this with a couple of the women he met, but even those ones grew tired of his act.

The other women he met called him out on the first date. He was probably very pushy in trying to get them back to his apartment. When the online heartthrob is nearly begging for sex on a first date, it’s a pretty good sign he was lying online. You can’t hide your true intentions once you meet her.

Single parent dating

Single parent dating

My kids are my life and raise them well (or at least my ex does)”

Lying about your height or what you’re really looking for in a relationship is one thing. But to actually fail to take care of your children is inexcusable. And then to lie about it? This friend is a childhood friend of mine that I’m quite disappointed in. He doesn’t even care at all about his kids but he wants women to think he does because he knows that’s attractive.

It didn’t take long for his recent girlfriend that he met online to figure it out. His online dating profile has 3-4 mentions of how much he loves his kids. Single Mom’s were all over him because of those comments. Once they actually met him, they found out that he doesn’t pay child support and doesn’t provide anything for his kids. Needless to say, the relationships never lasted. It’s a sad situation and another prime example of why you should be honest online.

Looking for in a relationship

Looking for in a relationship